I Won't Say Goodbye
by EndlessInspiration
Summary: Blaine's been keeping a secret, one that's been straining he and Kurt's relationship. Blaine's little sister is dying. Ignoring his demons about his own mothers fight with cancer, Kurt helps Blaine through the difficult time.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello Readers! I told you I'd get back to writing Klaine again! :D**

**This is the first part of what is probably going to be a two or three shot. Not too long. **

**It's some awesome Blaine angst, with Klaine, of course. I hope you enjoy it. (:**

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><p>This was the fourth time that week Kurt had caught Blaine crying. He watched helplessly across the library as Blaine wiped away the single tear, rubbing the eyes that Kurt had watched grow more tired and weary as the weeks went on, unaware that Kurt had even been watching. Blaine's red rimmed eyes were still staring blankly at the page of the library book before him, supposedly studying, but Kurt knew Blaine's thoughts were on anything but Shakespeare at the moment. What he could possibly thinking of, however, was impossible to tell. Kurt didn't know a lot about what was going on in Baine's head these days. They really hadn't spoken in weeks.<p>

Oh sure, they still went on their numerous coffee dates, studied together, went to Warblers practices and rehearsals, and even snuck in private moments alone to hold each other, cuddle and kiss; but they hadn't had a real conversation outside of shameless flirting and friendly banter in weeks. Whenever Kurt tried to prompt Blaine into talking about something deeper than homework, Regional's numbers or complimenting each other Blaine would brush it off, cutting Kurt off with kisses and jokes or maybe even serenading him.

The novelty of those, however, was slowly wearing away.

Kurt wanted to know just what was wrong with his boyfriend. For the past few weeks Blaine had begun to change. He would disappear for hours on end, hiding away in his room for what he told Kurt were private study sessions for finals. If Blaine's slipping grades were any indication, Kurt could tell he most likely wasn't studying all those hours he'd disappear. He was also less attentive; his eyes always filled with a far away look, his food at meals rarely touched. He was even beginning to lose a little weight, which worried Kurt immensely. He wasn't sure if it was stress from the upcoming final exams or practicing for Regional's or what but he desperately wished Blaine would tell him what was going on. He didn't know how much more of Blaine's persistent silence, distance and unexplained tears he could take.

Though the silence and distance had been going on for a while, the crying had only started recently. Kurt would catch Blaine wiping his eyes; watch as throughout the day his unfocused eyes would become clouded with tears that would never fall. Kurt didn't say anything. What could he say? Whenever he asked Blaine if he was feeling alright he'd say he was fine. Blame the tears on allergies, the bags under his eyes on lack of sleep before distracting Kurt with the charm and wit that Kurt was beginning to realize was a wall Blaine put up to avoid talking about what was really wrong.

Kurt didn't want to push Blaine though. Instead he went and sat back down across from Blaine who looked up and offered a dazzling smile, as if he hadn't been crying moments ago. Kurt offered a small smile back, his heart growing heavy. He could see the sadness still lingering in the other boys' eyes.

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><p>There were two things Kurt realized upon awaking. The first; Blaine's dorm room, where he and Blaine had apparently fallen asleep while studying together, was completely dark except for the light of the moon. The second thing he noticed was that the bed was shaking.<p>

Kurt sat up abruptly, about to stumble out of bed only to realize a body was sleeping beside him. His initial fear and confusion disappeared as soon as he realized it was Blaine, but returned once more when he realized Blaine was the source of the trembling.

Blaine was asleep, but it was far from peaceful. He was tossing and turning to the point of thrashing, his face screwed up in a look Kurt could only associate with pain, and he was crying. This was different from the lone tears Kurt had only ever seen before throughout the week; Blaine was sobbing. His chest heaving up and down as he drew in ragged breaths, his whole body trembling as he slept. He was clearly having a horrible nightmare, and Kurt didn't know what to do.

Kurt placed a hand on Blaine's side, trying to gently shake him awake. Blaine flinched away and Kurt felt his own eyes tear up as he desperately tried to wake his boyfriend, calling his name and shaking him. Blaine continued his fitful sleep, muttering in his sleep. Between the pleading "No's" and "Im sorry's" he was muttering the name of someone Kurt had never heard before. Alyssa.

Kurt decided to ignore this for now, focusing instead on waking Blaine. It wasn't until Kurt had forcefully grabbed Blaine's face and yelled his name the he awoke, sitting upright with a gasp before sobbing out, the bed trembling even harder. Kurt gathered Blaine into his arms without a second thought, and felt both heartbroken and relieved when he felt Blaine cling to him, burying his face in Kurt's neck as he continued to sob, holding onto Kurt for all he was worth. Kurt held on just as tightly, whispering soothing things into his ear.

Blaine continued to cry though, and Kurt was trying to think of ways to calm him down. He was surprised when a distant memory, his mother's voice, suddenly filled his mind. Kurt remembered the nights he'd wake from nightmares of her going back to the hospital, and though she was sick as ever, she would make her way to his room and sing him to sleep, lulling him to a state of calm and peacefulness as he fell back asleep. Kurt shook the memory from his mind as he tried it on Blaine, his quiet voice filling the room with the very song that used to lull him to sleep.

_Come with me, and you'll be, _

_In a world of pure imagination_

_Take a look, and you'll see_

_Into your imagination_

Kurt was relieved when he felt Blaine's trembling begin to slow, his heartbreaking sobs less frequent now. Blaine still clung on tightly however, tears soaking Kurt's shirt, so he continued to sing.

_We'll begin, with a spin, traveling in  
>The world of my creation<br>What we'll see, will defy, explanation…_

Blaine was beginning to clam now, crying silently in Kurt's arms. Kurt ran his hand up and down Blaine's back, trying his best to sooth him. He felt Blaine's breathing begin to even out as he continued to sing.

_If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it  
>Anything you want to do, do it<br>Want to change the world?  
>Theres nothing to it… <em>

Kurt settled on humming the songs melody over and over, still rubbing Blaine's back. It was a good while later when Kurt looked down and saw Blaine was asleep; his head nestled into Kurt's neck, arms still wrapped tightly around him. Kurt was happy he was sleeping again, thankful that the song had worked, but also worried. What had Blaine been dreaming about to work him up like that?

Blaine nuzzled closer into Kurt, his curly hair tickling Kurt's chin and Kurt smiled as he breathed in the other boys scent, enjoying their closeness. He decided he'd question Blaine in the morning, feeling himself already beginning to drift back to sleep. He settled down to sleep, holding Blaine close with no intention of ever letting go.

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><p>Kurt was trying in vain to work on his history project in the silent room, though his mind was occupied with thoughts about when his boyfriend would finally wake. Blaine was still asleep in his bed, peaceful at last. Kurt's mind was filled with thoughts of the previous night; Blaine's nightmare, the shaking and sobbing, how he had sung Blaine to sleep. He was extremely worried; after the weeks of distance and crying and silence, Kurt thought this was the final straw. He simply had to know what was wrong with Blaine now. It was killing Kurt to see him so upset.<p>

Kurt heard the rustling of sheets, making him turn around from Blaine's desk where he had been staring at the unanswered worksheet. He watched as Blaine slowly woke up, blinking multiple times and stretching with a soft sigh. Kurt couldn't help but think how absolutely adorable his boyfriend looked in the mornings, so relaxed and peaceful. When Blaine's gaze traveled across the room and landed on Kurt, he suddenly tensed, his eyes not quite meeting Kurt's gaze. Kurt cursed the nervousness he saw in Blaine's eyes and gave what he hoped was a comforting smile, crossing the room to sit on the bed next to Blaine.

"Hey." Kurt whispered, his fingers finding Blaine's under the blanket where they intertwined. Blaine gave a weak smile back.

"Hey…"

Awkward tension was already beginning to fill the room as memories of the night before filled both boys minds. Kurt could tell Blaine was embarrassed, though Kurt thought he had no reason to be. Blaine had already seen Kurt at some of his most vulnerable moments; why shouldn't Kurt be able to see Blaine's? Kurt was about to speak when Blaine broke the silence.

"I-I'm sorry about last night…" He said in a whisper, looking away. Kurt's heart sank at the tears he saw gathering in Blaine's eyes and squeezed his hand tighter, making him meet his eyes.

"There's nothing to be sorry for." Kurt said back, wiping away the tear that had fallen from Blaine's eyes.

"Thanks for singing to me…" Blaine whispered, looking away again. "Your voice is always so beautiful…"

"Blaine, are you okay?" The statement felt awkward once Kurt had said it aloud, but he really knew no other way to phrase it. Kurt saw Blaine bite his lip before he was about to respond, but once Blaine met his gaze, he saw something in Blaine's eyes change. They teared up again, and after a shaky breath, Blaine shook his head.

"No…" He whispered, honesty evident in his quiet voice. "Not really…"

"Would you like to tell me what's wrong?" When Blaine began to shake his head he cut him off, placing a finger to his lips. "Blaine, you've seen me at my worst, my most vulnerable. You've watched me cry, bitch out, complain, tell you how terrified I've felt, and confess my fears. Yesterday was your vulnerable moment with me, and that's okay. I'm your boyfriend, Blaine. Let me help you the way you always help me."

Blaine moved so he was sitting up, and Kurt didn't miss it when Blaine wiped his eyes again. Kurt met his teary eyes and Blaine looked away, chewing his bottom lip, hugging his knees. Kurt had never seen Blaine look so small.

"I… I don't know where to begin."

"Let's start with last night then…" Kurt prompted, moving so he was sitting next to Blaine, their knees touching. "What was your dream about."

Kurt felt Blaine begin to tremble a bit, the grip around his knees a bit harder. Kurt tentatively placed a hand on top of Blaine's own, happy when he felt Blaine hold it back.

"It was a… a nightmare. About my sister."

Kurt felt his brow furrow, and it was then that he realized he knew nothing about Blaine's family, other than that they lived a good four hours away and Blaine's dad was less accepting than Kurt's own. Kurt didn't know Blaine had any siblings.

"Alyssa?" Kurt suddenly said, remembering the name from the night before.

Blaine's head whipped to the side to look at Kurt, his face a bit fearful. "H-how did you know that?" He asked in a whisper, and Kurt rubbed his thumb in small circles over Blaine's hand to calm him down.

"You said that name last night, in your sleep." Kurt said simply, and Blaine nodded looking relieved. "Blaine, how come you never told me you had a sister?"

"I don't know…" Blaine said honestly, shrugging. "I don't like talking about my family much… I'm sort of ashamed."

"Ashamed of your family?"

"No…" Blaine said, shaking his head. "Ashamed that I… that I left them behind."

Kurt said nothing as Blaine's sentence hung heavy in the air. Kurt felt Blaine's now sweaty hand squeeze his again, the other boy sighing.

"I'm a coward, Kurt." He whispered, not meeting Kurt's gaze. "Don't try to say otherwise because I am. I let the bullies get to me and I ran away… I ran away from the bullies, from my family, from Alyssa…"

"Blaine, you're not a coward." Kurt whispered. "Look, I don't know a lot about your past. I don't know how bad your bullying was, or how your parents treated you, or anything but I do know that escaping bullies doesn't make you a coward. It means you were strong enough to know you had to get yourself to a safe place. Just like you always tell me."

Kurt was hoping for a smile, but Blaine only cried, the sight making Kurt's heart sink in his chest.

"But I ran away when they needed me… Alyssa needed me…"

Kurt felt his confusion growing but he tried in vain to comfort the boy beside him.

"Blaine, I'm sure your sister understands…"

"I know she does." Blaine cut Kurt off. "They all understand but fuck, Kurt," Kurt had never heard Blaine swear before. "They need me. Alyssa needs me and I should be with her but instead I'm a coward hiding from my bullies four hours away while she's home. I should be with her but I'm just… I ran away. I let them get to me, and now Alyssa's all alone…"

Blaine's breathing was beginning to get fast again and Kurt pulled him into his arms before there was a repeat of last night. Just like the night before Blaine buried his head in the crook of Kurt neck, crying silently, and Kurt rubbed his back. It was like this for a few moments before Blaine spoke again.

"Alyssa's dying…"

Kurt felt his mouth go dry and his heart jump in his chest. Blaine was still lying against him, calm now except for a few tears. He didn't know what to say, how to react.

"I… Blaine-"

"You don't have to say anything." Blaine cut him off and Kurt stopped talking, swallowing the lump in his throat. "I know that I've been reluctant to talk to you about my family and this week I've been crying and distant and stuff and I know you've noticed and just didn't say anything."

Kurt said nothing, so Blaine continued.

"Alyssa's only nine years old, Kurt. She has acute lymphocytic leukemia. She got diagnosed five years ago… The doctors say it's a miracle she's lived this long. When I left for Dalton she was getting better but recently… she's been getting worse. She used to stay at home with a nurse but now she's hospitalized. I've been iChatting with her everyday; that's why I keep disappearing. I try to talk to her when I can and she keeps asking if I'll come home and see her but it's four hours away and I haven't had time to go on weekends because of finals and Warblers and Regional's and I just feel so damn guilty all the time..."

Kurt stayed silent through Blaine's tearful speech, trying his hardest not to let his own fall.

"She needs me, Kurt. We were so close before I left but the bullying just became too much. I used to put up with it because I knew I had nowhere to go, and when I found out about Dalton I still said no because Alyssa needed me. But then she was getting better, and the bullying got worse... After one really bad attack I left. Now my family is four hours away and Alyssa's getting sicker and I'm so scared that she'll... pass away… and I wont be there…"

Blaine was beginning to sob again and Kurt held him close, letting his own tears fall with Blaine's. This was all too real. Kurt knew what it was like; losing someone you loved to cancer. His own mother had died of it. Kurt knew what it was like to watch someone slowly die, to watch their health go hopefully up and come crashing painfully down until the fight was too much and they were eventually gone. He clung to Blaine even tighter, thinking of his mom, and Blaine, and imaging a poor little Alyssa Anderson somewhere, alone in a hospital, wanting her big brother.

Kurt didn't say he was sorry. He had herd the phrase many times in his life, and he knew it did little to console. Instead he held Blaine closer, muttering 'I know' when Blaine would babble nonsense, wiping his tears, ignoring the lump in his throat. His past pain didn't matter right now. His only concern was Blaine.

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><p><strong>So… is it good so far? I'll be posting part 2 of 3 very, very soon. It's already finished, but I'll need a few days to do a final edit. <strong>

**Also the song Kurt sings to Blaine is Pure Imagination from the movie Charlie in the Chocolate Factory. Glee did a lovely cover of it. (:**

**Thanks you for reading and hopefully reviewing! I'll be sue to update soon!**

**Also, I have a tumblr, for those who want to follow my insanity and bug me to update my fics or just talk to me! :P It's somethingfandomrelated. tumblr .com. Just get rid of the spaces. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone! Thank you for all those awesome reviews! I'm gad you like the story so far. **

**Well, this is part two of three. Hope you enjoy this next chapter! :D**

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><p>For the next few weeks, things were getting better.<p>

Blaine and Kurt were talking again; really talking. Kurt was now spending every night in Blaine's single dorm room, confusing Kurt's roommate though he didn't say anything of it. They weren't doing anything bad. Kurt would simply spend every night holding Blaine as he told him stories about his past.

Sometimes they were happy stories of his childhood. Other times they were of the years in which Blaine's dad came to terms with Blaine being gay, and his numerous attempts at making Blaine more 'straight'. Most times however, Blaine would talk about Alyssa.

Alyssa sounded like an amazing little girl. According to Blaine she was too smart for her own good, loved to sing, and was the only person in the family to really accept him. Though she was only seven years old at the time, she had comforted Blaine when everyone else in the household turned a cold shoulder. Blaine felt he could never repay her for that childhood kindness.

Blaine talked a lot about Alyssa getting sick; the day she got diagnosed, the long hospital visits, how he had shaved his head when she lost her hair during chemo for the first time. He talked about spending his nights in her room in his childhood home instead of his own, taking care of her along with the night nurse. He talked about how hopeful he had felt when she began to get better.

He also talked about how a few weeks ago his mom told him Alyssa was being hospitalized once again. He talked about how guilty he felt; how he felt he never should have run away to Dalton because Alyssa needed him. How he had been trying his hardest to find a way home but just couldn't find time, and how it killed him whenever Alyssa asked when Blaine would come home.

Kurt always listened to these stories intently, sometimes throwing in stories about his own mother's condition; how her cancer progressed, her health going up and down before she finally died. The two boys grew a deeper bond over this new common link, and they felt closer to each other than they ever thought possible.

Some days they wouldn't even talk at all. They would just lay on Blaine's bed and hold each other.

Kurt understood as much as Blaine needed comfort he also needed his privacy. He never questioned Blaine when he asked to be left alone and went to his room for a few hours to talk to Alyssa. Kurt could sometimes hear Blaine's soft voice and strained laughter when he passed by his dorm.

Kurt and Blaine were sitting in the library together; Kurt's head buried in a copy of Great Expectations while Blaine stared blankly at his history book, mulling something over in his mind.

"I want you to visit Alyssa with me."

Kurt was caught off guard by the request, instantly closing his book, staring up at Blaine's hesitant eyes.

"Are you sure?"

"Y-yeah…" Blaine stuttered, running a hand through his hair. "I mean, you don't have to-"

"Oh I want to." Kurt said quickly, and Blaine gave a small smile, a rare sight nowadays.

"This weekend we don't have a Warblers practice and I thought I could take a break from studying for finals. I just… really want someone to be there with me, and I know she wants to meet you."

"She wants to meet me?"

Blaine nodded, still smiling.

"I tell her about you all the time. She's too smart for her own good, just like I said. She noticed I was less… sad, a few days ago, and I told her I had talked to you about being upset. She said she's happy you make me happy."

Kurt couldn't help the smile that grew on his face, and it only grew bigger when Blaine grabbed his hand, a hopeful look in his eyes.

"So you'll go with me next weekend?"

"Of course." Kurt said softly, lifting he and Blaine's joined hands, and kissing the top of Baines.

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><p>Kurt hated hospitals. Everything, from the smell and horrible colour palette to the constant sound of tears and feeling of sadness. Kurt hadn't stepped foot into one since his mothers death, but pushed his ill feelings aside as he gripped Blaine's hand harder, walking through the building with him.<p>

They were in the ward of the hospital filled with kids with cancer, and Kurt could sense Blaine's discomfort. His stance was tense, his eyes searching the halls nervously as his sweaty palm gripped Kurt's hand tighter, dragging him to room 227; Alyssa's room.

When they had finally reached the room Blaine stopped outside, turning to Kurt. Kurt looked into his eyes, seeing the nervousness and fear there, and understanding completely. He had been through all this before, and only hoped the outcome for Blaine's sister wouldn't end like his mother. He squeezed Blaine's hand again and nodded. Blaine let out a shaky breath, squeezing back before opening the door, never letting go of Kurt's hand.

"Blainey?" Kurt heard a little voice say from behind the curtain as soon as the door opened, and Kurt watched as Blaine began to smile before as pulled it open.

Kurt tried not to cry.

Alyssa Anderson was a heartbreaking sight. She looked so much like Blaine; with the big, expressive eyes, million dollar smile and thick eyebrows. Kurt was sure that if she still had hair, it would be a mess of curls just liked Blaine's. It was heart breaking because she was so beautiful, but also so sick. He skin was pale and sickly, her face happy but tired, her arms littered with marks from needles and various IV's. She looked like she was dying, a painful reminder that she actually was. Through the pain on her face he could see her brave smile, happy despite the bad hand life had given her.

It reminded Kurt a little of his mom.

"Hey Alyssa." Blaine let go of Kurt's hand to cross he room, bending down to place a gentle kiss on her forehead, Alyssa beaming at the contact, wrapping her arms gently around his neck. Kurt smiled at the loving sight of the two siblings being reunited.

"I missed you Blainey." Alyssa said in a soft voice, settling back against the pillows. Kurt had noticed her breathing was labored as well when she turned to him and smiled. "Is that Kurt?" She asked and Blaine nodded, looking at Kurt with a sort of admiring, proud smile. Kurt bushed under the intense gaze.

"Alyssa, this is my beautiful boyfriend, Kurt Hummel." He said proudly, making Kurt blush even deeper. "Kurt, this is my amazing little sister Alyssa Anderson." Alyssa smiled and offered her hand to Kurt, who shook it gently. It felt very small in his own.

"Very nice to meet you, Alyssa." Kurt said with a smile and a wink, despite the heaviness in his heart. He was happy when she giggled and smiled wider.

"You to. Blaine talks about you all the time." She said, and Kurt grinned when Blaine blushed.

"Blaine tells me about you all the time as well." Kurt said, he and Blaine moving to sit in two empty chairs next to her bed. "You sound like an amazing little girl."

Alyssa blushed, the colour very faint on her pale cheeks. She was about to say more when the door opened.

"Alyssa, I brought you another book, and I- Oh, hello."

Standing in the room with them now was a woman Kurt recognized as Blaine's mother, who looked a shocked at the sight of her son.

"Oh Blaine…' She said suddenly, rushing to her son's side and pulling him into tight hug. Kurt smiled at the personal moment, looking away from it to notice Alyssa's smiling face.

"I've missed you so much." Blaine's mother said as she pulled away, kissing his forehead. "I was wondering when you'd come up here."

"Well, I finally got time off…" Blaine trailed off, noticing his mother gaze had shifted to Kurt.

"Oh, sorry. Um, mom, this is my boyfriend Kurt."

Kurt smiled up at the woman, internally terrified as to what her reaction might be. Kurt wondered if she would be homophobic like Blaine's father, but she just smiled, shaking his hand.

"Its very nice to finally meet you, Kurt." She said warmly, and Kurt felt relieved. "My sons told me many good things about you."

Blaine blushed along with Kurt, though they were both smiling.

"Aren't they cute together mommy?" Alyssa said from behind her mother, smiling faintly at her older brother. Mrs. Anderson nodded, smiling.

"Yes, they seem to make quite a cute couple." She agreed with a wink, turning back towards her son.

"Well it's lunch now and I was going to go down to the cafeteria after dropping Alyssa off her books. Would you two like to join me?"

"What about Alyssa?" Blaine began to protest, but Mrs. Anderson put a comforting hand on his shoulder, calming him down.

"I know dear, but Alyssa's doctors are coming in to do a few blood tests and such, and she'll be fine on her own. I'm always such worried mother hen when she gets her needles the doctors prefer me gone anyways." She finished with a small laugh, though neither of the boys returned it.

"Go eat lunch Blainey." Alyssa urged, grinning in satisfaction when his stomach gave a loud growl. "See? You're hungry."

Blaine rolled his eyes and Kurt stooped him before he could protest.

"Come on Blaine, we should go eat lunch with your mom. You haven't seen each other in a while and I'm sure Alyssa will be fine for an hour."

"But you ate on the way up here, while I was sleeping." Kurt smiled guiltily, shrugging.

"I could always have water…"

"I want to talk to Kurt." Alyssa suddenly said, all eyes turning to the little girl. "Alone, uh, please."

Everyone stared at the little girl. Kurt, who was genuinely shocked at her request, looked at the faces of those around him. Mrs. Anderson looked surprised, Blaine wary and confused. Alyssa had her arms crossed, and looked tired but determined.

"Please Blainey?" She asked with a pout in such a small voice Kurt swore he could see Blaine's heart melt in his eyes. Blaine nodded, standing up to give Kurt a reassuring smile.

"She doesn't bite, I promise." He teased, and Alyssa gave an adorable "HEY!" from behind them. Kurt laughed, though the butterflies in his stomach didn't stop.

"We'll be back soon sweetie." Mrs. Anderson said, her and Blaine walking to the door. "Be nice to Kurt, okay? The doctors will be here in a bit. And Kurt, if you're looking for us we'll be in the cafeteria."

Both Alyssa and Kurt nodded as the two Andersons left with departing smiles, leaving Kurt and Alyssa alone.

Kurt turned to face Alyssa, who was still smiling at him. As foolish as it was, he couldn't help but feel intimidated by the little girl.

"So, you're Blainey's boyfriend."

Kurt nodded with a smile.

"Blaine talks a lot about you." She said softly, looking out the window instead of at him. "He says you're really nice, and you sing really good, and you have amazing clothes. Oh, and that you're really beautiful."

Kurt blushed at her words, his heart warming as he thought of Blaine.

"He also told me that your mama died of cancer. Sort of like me."

Kurt wiped his sweaty hands on his pants nervously. The room had suddenly grown very cold.

"I don't mind it much, you know." She said almost wistfully. "Dying, I mean."

Kurt couldn't find words to speak. Instead he kept listening.

"You'd think it would be more scary but it's not. I mean, everybody dies, right? I guess I'm just going a little earlier than most people… "

She turned to Kurt now, and Kurt felt entrapped in her wide, tearful eyes. They looked so much like her brothers.

"I'm not scared of dying, but I wish I didn't have to. I wish I could grow up, and make friends, and go to school. I never had friends as a kid- only Blaine. He's my brother and my best friend. I'm really scared of leaving Blaine with mom and dad. I'm scared that me dying is gonna make him sad."

"I love Blaine." She said, Kurt swallowing a lump in his throat at the sight of her tears. The two of them were crying now. Kurt couldn't help but think of how brave she sounded, so accepting of her fate. Just like his mother had been before she passed. "And I know he loves me too. He loves me a lot. And I know how sad he is about me dying, but I also know that you make him really happy. Whenever we talked he would be upset and crying and sad, until he told me he talked to you. Then he was happier."

"Kurt, I just wanted to ask you if… if you would make sure Blaine doesn't feel sad after I die. If you'll make him happy once I'm gone. I don't like seeing my brother sad. I don't want him to be sad because of me."

Kurt was crying even harder now. He felt Alyssa grab his shaking hand, her grip light and weak.

"Will you promise me?" She asked in a cracking voice, tears still in her eyes. "Please?" Kurt nodded, still holding Alyssa's hand.

"Of course I will." He said in a cracking voice, and was surprised when Alyssa moved herself to be in his arms. He hugged her lightly, and Kurt could feel her weak grip, her labored breathing, her warm tears and her frail body. She was very cold.

"Thank you Kurt." She said when she pulled away and he helped her settle back into the bed, the magnitude of the promise he made heavy in his heart. But he knew no matter what happened between Blaine and him, it was a promise he would forever keep.

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><p><strong>Awwww Isn't Alyssa just the cutest, most heartbreaking sight?<strong>

**She really loves her brother you know, and she knows how much Blaine loves Kurt. She's too smart, that little girl. :)**

**Anyway, Reviews would be greatly appreciated! I'd like to know what you guys think of this so far, and what you think is going to happen? Is Alyssa going to die? Will some miracle make her live? How is Kurt feeling about all this with all these memories of his mom resurfacing?**

**So, yeah, reviews would be awesome! :D**

**Also, part three might not be posted until next week as Im away all weekend, but I promise you it is already halfway done. Also I have a tumblr for those of you who want to bug me to update, ask questions, or see how insane I really am. Links in my profile. (:**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys **

**I know I said this story would be three parts but it's looking more like four now**

**Here's part three of four and hopefully the last chapter will come faster than this one did.**

**I know its short but I wanted to post _something_ so here it is! **

**Enjoy (:**

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><p>Kurt was happy to finally be home. He had dropped Blaine off at Dalton before going home to have Sunday night dinner with his family before school on Monday. Kurt was glad they had taken the trip- Blaine seemed to be more at ease now that he had seen his sister, who he had spent a lot of the trip with. Kurt loved watching the two of them together; Blaine was such a good brother. Throughout the whole trip he hardly left his sisters side.<p>

Though Blaine's dad did show up (making things awkward when he realized exactly what Kurt and Blaine were) the weekend was still successful. Kurt had spent most of his time helping Mrs. Anderson at her home while Blaine and his father stayed with Alyssa. He enjoyed helping her with the housework he had been doing at his own house since his mothers passing, and he learned a lot about Blaine's family and cute childhood stories he would use to tease Blaine later on.

But now he was at home, pushing food around his plate, not at all hungry. Though he had offered a false sense of cheeriness and happiness for Blaine's sake all weekend, now he was just tired and depressed. His stomach was in knots and he felt sick, his mind permanently stuck on thoughts of Alyssa.

He couldn't stop thinking about her, lying sick in bed, yet still offering a smile through all the pain. The whole weekend had been a bit disturbing for Kurt, who couldn't stop thinking of his mother. Thoughts of both Alyssa and his mother haunted his mind; images of them sick in bed, slowly losing their lives. He hadn't talked to Blaine about it as the weekend had been for him. Supporting Blaine, being there for him; Kurt didn't want to make the weekend about himself. But now that he was at home he was emotionally exhausted. Really, he just wanted to go to his room and cry for a bit before going to sleep.

"You okay buddy?"

Kurt looked up at his blurry father, realizing his eyes were teary. He blinked them back, nodding, trying to smile.

"Dude, you're crying." Kurt shot Finn a withering look but said nothing, looking back down at his full plate, continuing to shove around his mixed vegetables.

"Kurt, you've had a long weekend." He heard Carole say from across the table. "If you're not hungry you can just go on up to bed."

Kurt nodded, not looking up as he stood and left the room. Halfway up the stairs he had to cover his mouth as not to sob out loud.

* * *

><p>"Kurt?"<p>

Kurt hadn't realized someone had walked into his room. He looked up and saw his dad standing in the doorway, holding his hat in his hands, looking at Kurt with sad, hesitant eyes.

"Dad…" Kurt tailed off, unsure of what to say. Burt crossed the room, sitting on the edge of Kurt's bed, next to his son.

"What's wrong?" Burt asked hesitantly, toying with the hat in his hands. Kurt sighed.

"I guess it's just been a long weekend." Kurt whispered, his voice hoarse from his previous crying.

"Well, what happened? You went to visit Blaine's family I know. Did they not treat you guys right or something?" Kurt shook his head quickly as his dad's voice grew angrier.

"No no, nothing like that. Blaine's dad wasn't welcome nor unwelcome to us, but Blaine's mother is lovely. It's mostly his… his little sister."

"Blaine's got a sister?"

"Her names Alyssa." Kurt said quietly. "She's nine years old." He looked up now, meeting his father with blurry eyes.

"She's dying, dad. It's... It's c-cancer."

The air between both Hummel men stilled for a moment, the room suddenly very cold. It was when Kurt's shoulders started shaking with more silent sobs that Burt placed a hesitant hand on Kurt's shoulder, unsure of what to do. Kurt however, moved into his father's arms, clinging tightly to his father who held on back just as tightly. Burt couldn't remember the last time Kurt looked so vulnerable and small.

"I just… the whole weekend reminded me of mom." Kurt admitted quietly, crying into his father's chest. "A-and I know how hard it was on Blaine to have to see his little sister like that all weekend so I didn't talk to him about it but now that I'm home… everything's just catching up to me… I can't stop thinking about when it was mom in that hospital bed..." Burt rubbed his sons back soothingly, ignoring his own tears. It had been a long time since he thought back on those painful months in which he watched his wife slowly disappear before his eyes. It was something he hated thinking about. But now Kurt was here, hurting, and Burt knew he had to comfort his son.

"It's okay Kurt… I know... I remember…" Burt whispered as Kurt cried, feeing his sob's beginning to slow down.

"It's just hard to remember all that again." He whispered. "It's been so long since I thought about it. It was hard to see someone slowly dying like that again… I just… why did she have to die, dad? I wish she was still here."

"We don't know why mom died." Burt said, looking at his son. "We don't know why she had to go, but she did, Kurt. And it sucks, and it hurts, but death is a part of life. We all have to accept that. We know that better than anyone." It had been so long since Burt had talked about Kurt's mother. When he did, it felt almost like she was still there.

"I don't want Blaine to have to go through that." Kurt whispered, still crying silently. "He loves her so much. I don't want her to die. She's only a little girl."

Burt stayed silent, not knowing what to say.

"She's really amazing dad. You know what she did this weekend? She made me promise to make sure Blaine isn't sad when she dies. She said she doesn't want him to be sad when she goes, and that I make him happy. But it was scary, the way she just sort of just… accepts the fact that she's going to die. Just like… just like mom did."

Burt swallowed a lump in his throat, answering his son in a shaky voice.

"You know what you gotta do then?"

Kurt shook his head, which was now resting on Burt's shoulder.

"You gotta be there for Blaine, kid." Burt said, blinking back tears. "If his sister ends up going... its gonna be hard. He's gonna be even more heartbroken, and he's gonna grieve, and be upset, and have a million questions but you just gotta be there. You had me for all of this, and now Blaine's gonna need you."

Kurt nodded eyes still teary.

"And Kurt?"

"Yeah dad?"

"Thanks for talking to me about this. I know how hard it was… when your mother passed… and I want you to know it's okay to still be upset and to still miss her. I miss her to."

"I love you dad."

Burt hugged Kurt tighter, pulling away with red eyes.

"I love you too, Kurt. Now get some rest. You still have school tomorrow."

With that Burt left the room, closing the door behind him. Kurt slept peacefully that night, oddly comforted by talking to his father about how he felt.

In the middle of the night, Burt snuck out without a word, driving to the graveyard. And for the first time in a long time, Burt mourned cried for his first wife, his son's mother, his first love.

* * *

><p>Things had been getting a bit better.<p>

Blaine was smiling again, singing with emotion again, and even joking with his friends. Kurt was so happy to have the old Blaine back; he wanted to sing about it from the rooftops. His boyfriend was actually _smiling_ again.

Of course, Blaine wasn't always happy. He would still iChat with Alyssa every night, Kurt even joining him sometimes. Those nights were the hardest, as it was painfully obvious every day that Alyssa was getting sicker. She could only stay up for half an hour at a time and she was paler, weaker, her eyes always drooping. Sometimes she wouldn't even talk. She would lay in her hospital bed and listen, her lips twitching into the barest of smiles at Blaine's jokes, but otherwise motionless.

The week was quickly drawing to a close and Kurt could tell Blaine was growing anxious. That weekend Kurt and Blaine would be driving four hours again to visit the Andersons. Burt wasn't all too pleased that Kurt was spending another weekend away from home, but understood and let him go. He knew how much Blaine needed him through all that.

So right after school on Friday, their bags already packed, the two boys left directly from Dalton for the hospital. The beginning of the car ride was spent joking about the homework they planned on neglecting, singing along to The Little Mermaid soundtrack (that Kurt teased Blaine mercilessly for when he saw it in his car) and sharing soft smiles. However, the happy mood slowly but surely disappeared. The closer they got to the Hospital, the quieter Blaine grew. When the soundtrack was over for the second time Blaine didn't bother putting music back on. The two boys sat in silence, holding hands.

Blaine's grip grew harder when they pulled into the Hospitals parking lot. But Kurt just held on tighter, letting him silently know he didn't plan on letting go.

Together they set off to go see Alyssa.

* * *

><p>Alyssa looked even worse in person.<p>

Kurt was slightly horrified by the sight. She just looked so... tiny. Tiny and frail and weak. Her skin was practically see through, her chest rising and falling weakly with labored breaths. Kurt assumed she was sleeping but was proved wrong when Alyssa began to speak in a whisper, her eyes still closed.

"Blaine? Is that you?" Her sentence ended in a fit of coughs that Blaine's mother frantically tried to soothe. Kurt noticed how tired she looked; her eyes rimmed red, her rumpled clothing and messy hair making it obvious that she hadn't left the hospital for a number of days. Blaine's father stood on the other side of the room, looking helpless as he watched his daughter. He didn't even have the energy to send a withering look at Kurt and Blaine's joined hands as he did the last time they visited.

Everybody just looked so… defeated.

Blaine walked towards Alyssa's bed with Kurt, still not letting go of his hand. If anything he held on tighter, and Kurt felt him shaking slightly. There were already tears in both their eyes.

"Shh, yes it's me Alyssa… Kurt and I came to visit you."

"Hello…" She said breathlessly, eyes still closed. "I-Id hug you but I'm to tired."

Kurt watched and Blaine bit a trembling lip, but said nothing.

Kurt watched as the family stood around Alyssa in an eerie silence, watching her fitfully sleep. Kurt said nothing, holding Blaine's hand tightly, trying his hardest not to let his own tears fall.

* * *

><p>…<strong>. It was short I know, but adding the next part isnt done yet and I felt guilty for not updating so I hope this will tie you all over until the end.<strong>

**I'll try to update ASAP, and please please please **_**please**_** review! I want to know if you guys like this story. :)**


	4. Chapter 4

… **sorry this took so long, again. But the last part is finally here!**

**It's unbeta'd because… well, I don't have a beta. :/ **

**I should really try and find one…**

**Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it!**

* * *

><p>"Visiting hours are up, guys. Only one person can stay here tonight."<p>

Kurt and Blaine looked up at the nurse, who offered a small smile before walking past their room. Blaine turned to a still sleeping Alyssa, looking conflicted.

"I'm staying here tonight." Blaine's dad said from behind them, placing a hand on Blaine's shoulder. "You should go home and rest, son."

His father's tone was nothing to be argued with, but Kurt could see the disappointment in Blaine's eyes. He looked like he was about to argue, but decided against it.

"Let's go Blaine. We'll come back tomorrow."

Blaine sighed but stood up, still holding Kurt's hand. Kurt noticed Blaine's fathers eyes flicker towards them, but he said nothing.

"Blainey's leaving?"

Both boys quickly looked over at the bed, where Alyssa had opened her tired eyes slightly.

"Shhh… It's okay Alyssa. I'll be back tomorrow."

"I'm so tired…" Alyssa whispered to herself, almost unaware of everybody in the room. "Blaine… I want to say I love you. And, and I think I'm going to leave soon."

Kurt's heart leapt in his throat, his eyes watering when he realized what she meant. Blaine just stared at her, his face unreadable.

"I love you too Alyssa, and that's right. You'll get better and be out of here in no time."

"That's not what I meant…" Alyssa whispered, her voice cracking. "Goodbye, Blaine."

Blaine stared at his sister, eyes filled with tears. Kurt watched him bite his lip, open his mouth slightly to speak, but quickly close it. Kurt wondered to himself what he was going to say. His face went from a look of anguish to its previously unreadable look and without saying anything else, Blaine and Kurt left the room. Blaine was taking them quickly down the hall, Kurt being dragged silently beside him.

Kurt realized that the thing Blaine had avoided saying was goodbye.

Both boys were silent during the car ride home, Kurt watching as Blaine tried his best to hold in his tears. He had made it the whole car ride to the Anderson house without saying a word. The house was quiet when they entered. Blaine's mother was laying on the couch, sleeping. The boys crept quietly up the stairs as not to disturb her, making it to the safety of Blaine's room and shutting the door.

"Blaine?"

"Yeah?" Blaine said in a dull voice, shedding off his sweater so he was in a plain t-shirt and black jeans. Kurt really noticed then how Blaine's habit of not eating when he was upset was taking a toll on him. The usually fitted t-shirt Blaine wore under his clothes was loose now, hanging off of his body. Kurt watched Blaine walk across the room, mindlessly tidying up his spotless desk, fiddling with stacks of paper, straightening books on the shelf. Another habit Kurt discovered Blaine did when he was worried or upset.

"Why didn't you say goodbye?"

Blaine tensed, stopping his actions; eyes trained on the ground so Kurt couldn't see them. Part of Kurt wished he hadn't said anything, fearing he might have upset Blaine, but the other knew something was wrong and Blaine had to talk about it. He wouldn't let Blain close up again. He wouldn't let things get like they were before.

"What are you talking about?" Blaine said, still looking down. His voice cracked, and Kurt knew he was trying not to cry.

"I-in the hospital." Kurt said, slowly crossing the room so he was standing next to Blaine, who still wouldn't look at him. "Alyssa said goodbye, but you couldn't say it back."

The room was silent and tense for a moment before Blaine finally looked up. Tears were streaming down his face.

"I… I couldn't Kurt. I just-" Blaine stopped for a moment his breath hitching. Kurt quickly placed his arms around him, hugging Blaine from behind, their cheeks touching. Kurt could feel the wetness of Blaine's tears on his face.

"I don't want her to die." Blaine said in a whisper, his tears suddenly coming in fast. Kurt guided them to the bed, pulling Blaine to his chest where he began to cry. He wasn't sobbing this time, he wasn't crying out. This time he was just simply crying, shaking in Kurt's arms, silent except for occasional whimpers. Kurt had never seen Blaine look so open, so vulnerable, laying in his arms like this, and he was honored Blaine was comfortable enough to be with him like this. Blaine has always been there for Kurt, and now it was Kurt's turn. Kurt would hold Blaine in his arms, dry his tears, whisper comforts into his ear through all the hours of the night until the hurt stopped. Kurt hated to see Blaine so upset, but knew he would do anything to make it better.

It was in that moment that Kurt realized he was in love with the crying boy in his arms, and he would do anything to see him smile again.

* * *

><p>Kurt and Blaine awoke to an empty house the next morning, a note in the kitchen telling them Blaine's mother had left earlier and let them sleep in. Though Blaine was more anxious to get to the hospital, Kurt was glad he had gotten the much needed sleep. They didn't get to sleep until late last night, when Blaine's tears finally stopped and the two lay in silence together, holding each other. They hadn't slept until the early hours of the morning, both physically and emotionally exhausted.<p>

When they got to the hospital it was one in the afternoon.

Kurt and Blaine walked in together, holding hands as usual as they made their way to Alyssa's room, walking through the unusually silent halls. When the turned the corner to go down Alyssa's hallway, the sight they saw made their hearts stop.

Both Andersons were standing outside the room with the doctor and some nurses. Blaine's mother was sobbing, a nurse patting her back soothingly. Blaine's father looked faint. The door to Alyssa's room was open behind them.

"No…" Kurt whispered to himself, his body going cold when he felt Blaine let go of his hand, running down the hall, past his parents and into the room.

"NO!" Kurt heard the shout from inside, and his eyes clouded with tears. He knew what this all meant. The consoling nurses, the speeches from the doctors, the empty room, the look of helplessness on Blaine's fathers face.

Alyssa had died.

"No no no no!" Kurt ran down the hall, into Alyssa's room where Blaine was standing, tears rolling down his red face, frantic eyes searching the empty bed.

"Where's Alyssa?" He asked desperately, grabbing Kurt's arms. Kurt was terrified by the look in his eyes.

"Kurt, where did they take Alyssa?"

"B-Blaine…" Kurt whispered, shaking his head, tears rolling down his face. Blaine begins to shake, backing away slowly.

"No…" He whispered to himself, and Kurt noticed Baines parents walk into the room, his mother crying harder at the sight of her son. "No she can't be dead! She can't be gone!"

"Blaine…" His mother whispered from across the room, still holding herself together. "Blaine I'm so sorry…"

Blaine stared at them both before his face crumpled into a look of anguish, Kurt getting to him in time to catch him before he fell to his knees, body wracking with sobs.

"Blaine I'm sorry." Kurt whispered, ignoring his own tears, holding Blaine close to his chest. "Blaine I'm so sorry. I'm here. It's going to be okay."

"I never got to say goodbye." Blaine calmed long enough to whisper to himself before sobbing violently again.

Kurt held Blaine close, ignoring the way his own chest constricted with the sobs he held back, ignoring the tears falling from his eyes. Memories of his mother hit him left and right as he remembered. He remembered being told his mother would never come back, he remembered the pain, the heartbreak, that feeling of loneliness, like everything was falling apart. He thought of what he knew Blaine was feeling and clung to him tighter, not only for Blaine's comfort but for his own.

They stayed in that room for hours, Blaine sobbing in Kurt's arms until he fell asleep, too exhausted to keep going. Despite Blaine's fathers protests, Kurt carried Blaine in his arms out of the room, holding him in the back seat of the Andersons car when they drove home that night, Blaine's mother promising they'd pick up Kurt's car the next day.

Kurt looked down at the sleeping boy in his arms who was calm now, cuddled into his chest. He thought of what tomorrow would bring. How Blaine would begin to go through the stages of grief. How Blaine would want to close up and not talk about it, about how he'd miss Alyssa so much he wouldn't be able to stand it, about how Blaine was going to feel like his world is ending.

Then Kurt thought of Alyssa, and the promise he made her, and knew no matter what happened, no matter what their relationship might become during all this, Kurt was never going to leave this boy in his arms. This boy he loves. This boy who he promised Alyssa he would make happy no matter what.

* * *

><p>Kurt and Blaine took the next week off of school, Kurt refusing to leave Blaine's side throughout the funeral process. It was a difficult time, but they were getting through it. Kurt would hold Blaine close to his chest every night, just like the very first night Alyssa died, wishing all his pain away.<p>

That had been the night Kurt told Blaine he loved him. Blaine had stopped crying long enough to say it back, and Kurt saw a momentary flicker of the old Blaine behind his heartbroken eyes. He knew then that eventually, things would be okay.

Alyssa's funeral was on a breezy summer day. The sky was cloudy, protecting the family who had gathered in the graveyard from the bright sun. Kurt's father was there as well, holding Carole's hand, Kurt and him sharing meaningful looks from across the grave. Kurt held Blaine's hand through the whole ceremony, ignoring the uncomfortable glances sent to them from distant family. Blaine's close family, the ones who mattered, we're too busy grieving to care.

Blaine just really needed a hand to hold, and Kurt had assured him he would be there for everything. It was almost weird at first, seeing Blaine suddenly become weak and vulnerable, unlike his usually strong side. But Kurt loved him through all of it, and promised Blaine every night while he cried he would never leave. Just like he had promised Alyssa.

Kurt and Blaine both put roses on the casket moments before it finally descended into the ground, their last goodbyes said and done. The two boys stood there together for a long time; long after the grave has been filled and the family began to leave, offering sympathetic looks in their direction before leaving for the Andersons house. Burt and Carole were going as well, and Kurt would be going home with them that evening. They watched as all the people slowly began to disappear, leaving them alone. Kurt knew Blaine wasn't ready to face all those people yet; to hear all those apologies and sympathetic words. Right now, all they needed was some silence.

Kurt tugged on Blaine's hand, and they began to walk at a slow pace around the graveyard, until they reached the top of a hill, where a tall tree offered some shade. For a split second Kurt thought it was Pavarotti's tree but then remembered that it was hours away in Lima. He looked up at Blaine, squeezing his hand.

"This reminds me of Pav's tree." Kurt said, offering a small grin. Blaine nodded, his eyes still looking far away. Kurt couldn't think of what to say next. Part of him thought maybe he didn't need to.

"Will things ever feel okay again?" Blaine asked in a whisper, looking at Kurt with dark, teary eyes. Kurt squeezed his hand tighter, moving so their arms were both touching.

"Yeah. I mean, you'll never forget her. You'll always miss her and she'll always be a part of you. But the days will eventually get easier. Soon you'll begin to move on."

"I just don't like feeling like this." Blaine admitted. "I feel so… empty. It hurts."

"I know." Kurt whispered, remember the days in his childhood when he would sit in his room and cry, clutching his chest, wishing the horrible longing for his mother would stop. "I know."

"But you'll be okay." Kurt said again. "I know it might not be for a while, but soon. One day. And I promise I'll be here for you every day, no matter what, to make you happy." He squeezed Blaine's hand. "I have a promise to keep." He added before he could stop himself.

"A promise?"

"To Alyssa." Kurt said quietly, watching Blaine's eyes widen a bit.

"That day when you went for lunch… during our first visit… she made me promise to make you happy. She made me promise her to make sure you weren't sad when she… when she died. "

Blaine was silent for a moment, looking away. Kurt knew he was crying.

"She wanted you to be happy, Blaine." Kurt said, tears chocking his voice now. "And she made me promise to keep you happy. So no matter what happens to us, between us, from now until the future, I promise to keep you happy." He said, sniffling.

"And Kurt Hummel always keeps his promises." He tried to joke at the end, but it came out more like a whisper as he wiped his eyes with the hand that wasn't clutching Blaine's. Blaine finally looked up, staring intensely at Kurt, a familiar flicker of the old Blaine appearing for the first time that day.

"I love you." Blaine whispered, his voice cracking. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." Kurt whispered, pulling Blaine into his arms, hugging him tightly, his heart lifting with a new emotion in his chest when Blaine pulled back with a smile. Hope.

* * *

><p><strong>Wheeeeee its finally done!<strong>

**I hope you all enjoyed this story. I know I loved writing it. **

**Please review! :)**


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